Wednesday, June 23, 2004
dry.
2day's strange.
Was conscious around a hummingbird 7am dis morning, wch happens to b more atypical den flying pigs?! (sori, cudnt tink of a better eg evidently..) Of coz, half of the disruption was contributed by dear mama when she came crashing in to wake my beloved bro for dreadful work (another reason y i m still in denial mode). Mind u, being a light-sleeper is truly, madly, deeply unfortunate when u hv 2 share a room wif sumbody else.
Anyhoo..wento the market to get myslf sum zui kueh for BFAST, (4 once it's known s bfast n not brunch) after wch i ended up downing another 2 whole cups of lipton tea to alleviate sum of those nasty grease lining my tummy, yet AGAIN. Den knocked out 4 some 2 hrs while watching some old seasons of FRIENDS..man! do i feel like some old soul nodding off while rocking the chair n watchin' pigeons on the veranda..n when i woke up, i was struggling to remember wch timezone i m situated in. Isn't tea supposed to contain caffeine? Wassit decaf-lipton or worse, lipton-make-u-drowsy wch i downed??
The imperial decree frm empress dowager has confined mi 2 the house 2day; not supposed to go out coz she's. Nid 2 get food n boil water 4 gran..owell..last nite he asked mi y din i mention i m staying wif gran..hmm..n i replied it was coz she's not a veri significant part of my life; she's juz sumbdy in the bckgrd.
Thing is, i guess there is sum part of mi angry wif the living arrangement. C..gran's staying wif us coz dad's the eldest son in the family n according to those damn traditions (wch i tink r mostly a mixture of obstination, resistance to changes n xcuses to take things 4 granted. If u feel i'm not a fan, hey! guess wot? U r RIGHT ON!), it makes it ntg but rite 4 her 2 b staying wif us. I noe it's reli silly to feel angry at such matters, n i'm not exactly mad at her personally either..but traditions in dis manner r simply impractically loathesome. Bcoz of traditions, mi n my bro have been deprived of our own rooms, stg wch i seriously value n nvr got2 hv. Not like we hate each other but hving our private spaces is a whole other issue. Bcoz of traditions, i c dear mama slogging her guts out 2 take care of her man's mother n made many, many unimaginable sacrifices for the family. Bcoz of traditions, i c how patriarchy not oni lurks but blatantly oppresses women s the underdogs, rendering it customary for mothers to put the family before self. Bcoz of traditions, i c how my auntie n her husband, childless, hv the luxury of subletting xtra rooms in their 4-room, where it would oni b more just if gran had stayed wif dem instead but cudn't bcoz a man does not stay wif his wife's parents. Bcoz of traditions, i c the possibility of myslf being entwined in a similar situation in future; depriving my kids of the space dey deserved, working 24/7 in the public sphere n domestically, sacrificing all desires n dreams for the family..wch is oso y i seriously, seriously DO NOT wanto stay wif my spouse's family, except under veri, veri special circumstances. Staying in the vicinity, even nxt dr, is not a problem, but under the same roof? Nope.
..wch is oso y i tend to over-think n ask weird qns abt the future, espy when i'm involved wif sumbody..not in my intention to rush things, but it's more of like putting my foot down on stgs dat i'll nvr change my mind abt n not wanting to waste the other party's time n risking him feel let down 10 yrs dwn the road when he realises he has been putting his eggs in the wrong basket, not literally. It's a lil' like a verbal pre-nuptial agreemt, ya noe? Juz a lil' safety net to assure bof mi n him.
O look! it's time to get dinner for gran again..how exciting!zzzzz...
p/s: i hv 3 giant zits..n boi do dey hurt!!! ARGHHH..y can't those things juz leave mi alone...
¶ J poppycocked at 5:52:00 PM
Was conscious around a hummingbird 7am dis morning, wch happens to b more atypical den flying pigs?! (sori, cudnt tink of a better eg evidently..) Of coz, half of the disruption was contributed by dear mama when she came crashing in to wake my beloved bro for dreadful work (another reason y i m still in denial mode). Mind u, being a light-sleeper is truly, madly, deeply unfortunate when u hv 2 share a room wif sumbody else.
Anyhoo..wento the market to get myslf sum zui kueh for BFAST, (4 once it's known s bfast n not brunch) after wch i ended up downing another 2 whole cups of lipton tea to alleviate sum of those nasty grease lining my tummy, yet AGAIN. Den knocked out 4 some 2 hrs while watching some old seasons of FRIENDS..man! do i feel like some old soul nodding off while rocking the chair n watchin' pigeons on the veranda..n when i woke up, i was struggling to remember wch timezone i m situated in. Isn't tea supposed to contain caffeine? Wassit decaf-lipton or worse, lipton-make-u-drowsy wch i downed??
The imperial decree frm empress dowager has confined mi 2 the house 2day; not supposed to go out coz she's. Nid 2 get food n boil water 4 gran..owell..last nite he asked mi y din i mention i m staying wif gran..hmm..n i replied it was coz she's not a veri significant part of my life; she's juz sumbdy in the bckgrd.
Thing is, i guess there is sum part of mi angry wif the living arrangement. C..gran's staying wif us coz dad's the eldest son in the family n according to those damn traditions (wch i tink r mostly a mixture of obstination, resistance to changes n xcuses to take things 4 granted. If u feel i'm not a fan, hey! guess wot? U r RIGHT ON!), it makes it ntg but rite 4 her 2 b staying wif us. I noe it's reli silly to feel angry at such matters, n i'm not exactly mad at her personally either..but traditions in dis manner r simply impractically loathesome. Bcoz of traditions, mi n my bro have been deprived of our own rooms, stg wch i seriously value n nvr got2 hv. Not like we hate each other but hving our private spaces is a whole other issue. Bcoz of traditions, i c dear mama slogging her guts out 2 take care of her man's mother n made many, many unimaginable sacrifices for the family. Bcoz of traditions, i c how patriarchy not oni lurks but blatantly oppresses women s the underdogs, rendering it customary for mothers to put the family before self. Bcoz of traditions, i c how my auntie n her husband, childless, hv the luxury of subletting xtra rooms in their 4-room, where it would oni b more just if gran had stayed wif dem instead but cudn't bcoz a man does not stay wif his wife's parents. Bcoz of traditions, i c the possibility of myslf being entwined in a similar situation in future; depriving my kids of the space dey deserved, working 24/7 in the public sphere n domestically, sacrificing all desires n dreams for the family..wch is oso y i seriously, seriously DO NOT wanto stay wif my spouse's family, except under veri, veri special circumstances. Staying in the vicinity, even nxt dr, is not a problem, but under the same roof? Nope.
..wch is oso y i tend to over-think n ask weird qns abt the future, espy when i'm involved wif sumbody..not in my intention to rush things, but it's more of like putting my foot down on stgs dat i'll nvr change my mind abt n not wanting to waste the other party's time n risking him feel let down 10 yrs dwn the road when he realises he has been putting his eggs in the wrong basket, not literally. It's a lil' like a verbal pre-nuptial agreemt, ya noe? Juz a lil' safety net to assure bof mi n him.
O look! it's time to get dinner for gran again..how exciting!zzzzz...
p/s: i hv 3 giant zits..n boi do dey hurt!!! ARGHHH..y can't those things juz leave mi alone...
¶ J poppycocked at 5:52:00 PM